A bit of a chatty one for you today
I wanted to do a chatty/ lifestyle topic today since I’ve not done one in ages since I wasn’t sure what to write. This topic was suggested by my friend so I thought I’d have a little ramble about my thoughts and experiences.
It’s an age old question with no clear answer. I remember when I was teenager (many moons ago!) I always said that if anybody ever cheated on me they’d get no second chance, I’d dump them etc. All this was said with a sassy attitude with one hand on my hip of course.
But life rarely works out like that, love complicates things and all the lines and boundaries get blurred and situations get manipulated and it all ends up one big mess of hurt and upset etc.
So the question is can a relationship ever survive it, and why do we stay with our partners when they have cheated on us? Firstly I think the lines on cheating are so blurred its hard to say. Personally I would say anything physical is a no go (as Jeremy Kyle would say “anything from a kiss to intercourse”) this is a pretty easy boundary. But the “emotional cheating” is much harder to define, and with all of our messaging systems and smart phones its pretty easy to do this and be sneaky with it. Messages can be deleted and passwords can be put on phones.
In my opinion emotional cheating is sending loving messages to other people, intimate pictures, asking them for pictures etc. Anything somebody feels the need to delete so their partner doesn’t see, is probably cheating. Obviously peoples opinions may differ to mine, but in my experience the “emotional cheating” is so much harder to get over it and deal with.
Can relationships survive it? I don’t think so. This may sound like a really blunt answer but I think once the trust is gone then all you have is a relationship in the state of anxiety, which isn’t really the point of having one. You go through insecurity, suspicion every time their phone bleeps or they go out, and start torturing yourself over it, you argue over it and the whole cycle begins again. So why do people still stay with their partners when they’ve cheated?