Morning guys, I wasn’t planning another lifestyle post for a while as I’ve had a couple of other posts lined up (like a beauty clear out, that was a tough one! bye bye make up..) but I received a comment on a post I did a while ago on why women always seem to blame other women when it comes to men (read it here) and it was obvious a lot of time and thought had gone into the comment and making an account especially to comment so I thought it deserved a decent response.
Also I don’t know if you guys know this (I didn’t until yesterday) but when you do comment on my posts, I can see your email, IP address and location of the comment. A quick search of the email means I now know exactly who posted this comment, which means it makes a lot more sense to me.
“I can see from your blog you are struggling with this issue but walk away and be happy in your own life, live your life now….as the saying goes ‘you can’t start your next chapter if you keep re reading the last one’… lots of people have bad relationships, it doesn’t make either person bad – it means you two didn’t work together, you were just unfortunately incompatable, and without sounding harsh your ex and his new girlfriend will have a completely different relationship (one that you don’t know anything about) to the one you had with him as you will have with your new boyfriend so be happy in that – it’s not great for your new relationship to keep dwelling on the last”
To be pretty honest this is a good piece of life advice, however I think that reflecting on the past can be healthy it can help you look back on mistakes you’ve made and avoid them in the future, not just in a relationship but in all aspects of life. Everything happens for a reason and I’m glad it did as I wouldn’t be as settled as I am now. In regards to posting about my past experiences, especially when it comes to my last relationships, that relationship was at a crucial point in my life and it lasted for 4 years. I’m only 24 so it means all of my experiences on life and relationships come from this which is why it’s my example on the few posts I’ve referenced it on. The lifestyle topics I post on have generally been inspired by other blogs I’ve read, and it’s nice to be able to post my own thoughts and feelings on various topics, and hopefully my experience can give others food for thought and inspire their posts. I want to have a lifestyle blog, meaning I can talk about other things rather then just beauty, fashion and art. I feel like it adds more depth to my blog and shows me as a real person, warts and all.
I think the poster of this comment has slightly missed the point of the post, yes I used events and my past relationship as an example in the post, but I also chose to talk about my own mistakes and lessons I’ve learnt through that, which was discussed at the end of the post. Now I know who the post was from that is understandable however it’s very easy to sit and judge somebodies life, thoughts and feelings from behind a computer screen and perhaps if your a little bias in the first place, take it in a way it wasn’t meant.
In regards to the slightly more personal comments about my life, again its easy to sit and make judgements about my previous relationship and how I feel about it but please keep in mind that you probably don’t know the full story. I have a lot of things I’d like to talk about on my blog regarding this relationship and the other people affected by it but I can’t for legal reasons and it’s simply not my place to talk about it. I hope my ex and his new girlfriend do have a completely different relationship to mine and I hope they are happy, but considering his behaviour when they first got together (post here) I don’t think my judgement on it was too harsh, but I apologise if I’ve hurt anybodies feelings.
In response to the comment about myself and Dan now, I’m very happy thanks 🙂 And I think that’s the reason I feel comfortable enough to share these posts. I’m not the same person and life has changed for the better. Thinking about my past doesn’t induce any feelings of anger or hurt on my part it’s simply a good learning curve, and one that I like to share with others on my blog so I can hopefully help out somebody else who may be going through similar things. I know by putting personal things on here I do open myself up to judgment from others, but I’m cool with that, I’m comfortable enough in my skin to deal with it 🙂
So “Motivational Molly” thank you very much for your comment, I do appreciate the time you’ve take to write to me and thank you for inspiring another post. I hope that you’ll take the time to comment more in future, and feel free to message me personally if you have anything else to discuss 🙂 but for now I think I’m just going to pinch this awesome quote you left me with and leave it there
‘you can’t start your next chapter if you keep re reading the last one’
Have an awesome weekend you lovely people! As always comments are appreciated!